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June 30, 2011 8:22 pm / takingbacksingle

The point of playing hard to get

For a while now, I’ve been told by my mother, friends and relatives that it is importantthat I  play “hard to get” with guys. These are the most common explanations I have received:

  • If you don’t do it you will come off as easy
  • Guys are programmed to like the chase
  • It’s the only way to weed out players and guys who aren’t really serious about you
Lately I’ve been questioning this concept though. It feels as if the whole hard to get leads to a lot of missed opportunities. Sometimes I have felt a connection with someone and as we said goodbye we were both awkwardly stalling but neither person dared take the step to ask for a number or make a date. Or I think guys that I was interested in have thought I wasn’t interested because I was trying really hard to be distant while all I wanted to do was give them a sign.
It’s not like I’m going to go and declare my love for every cute guy I meet, I’m not clingy at all, and in my experience I’ve found many guys to be clingy towards me. But when I meet someone I like I think I’m going to start to make that a bit more clear. It seems unfair  for guys to constantly be kept in the dark. Even Facebook friending a guy seems like a big deal to me. But on the other side, I do think it is good for both guys and girls to leave some things a bit mysterious and be a bit guarded. Not only does this make people more interested in you but it also prevents your heart from being broken every time someone doesn’t call you back. A balance is probably the best way to go.
What do you guys think about playing hard to get, is it something you do or are you against it?

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